Hearts with Promise

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'Love yesterday, today and forever.'

Jeremiah 31:3

'As water reflects the face, so one's life reflects the heart.'

Proverbs 27:19

The steady decline of both the quality and longevity of marriage in this country has
been of major concern for a long time, especially in the Christian community. Marriage is
still the societal norm, with studies showing that four out of every five adults get
married at some point in their lives. Unfortunately, divorce has also become a norm. Among
married couples, fully one third have experienced at least one divorce. And that statistic
doesn’t include the fact that, for young adults, cohabitation has risen dramatically, while
marriage rates have dropped.

It’s generally agreed that the divorce rate continues to be high because people don’t
approach marriage purposely enough, meaning they don’t invest enough time and energy to make
their marriages successful. That’s largely because they don’t know what to do to make them
better.

Christians who desire to improve their marriages, or whose marriages are already in
serious trouble, most often lack a comprehensive model of concrete actions and attitudes that
promise predictable success. While other resources available to them can be of substantial
help, what they miss may be sitting right in front of them when they open up the Bible.

Rarely have people studied the actual marriages depicted in Scripture. Most books and
sermons on the topic focus on various principles of marriage laid down in the teachings of
Jesus and his apostles, but ignore the many examples of marriages, both good and bad, in
the Old and New Testaments that actually illustrate what happens when certain conditions
exist and how the marital partners handled them. As it turns out, these marriages offer a
rich and unusually enlightening look into the dynamics of marriage to which we need to pay
close attention if we want to make the most out of our own marriages.

This is a book that finally addresses this deficit. It endeavors to provide the
reader with a detailed examination of each of these couple relationships to reveal the true
factors in a happy marriage that lasts.

You know you have found a compelling, must-read book when the opening pages speak
directly to you… which was my experience with THIS book. There are many books on biblical
marriage, godly marriage principles, tools for Christian husbands and wives… but how many books
truly take a deeper look at the actual couples and marriages in the Bible?  Could it be
that these Biblical examples of broken marriages, dysfunctional marriages, vibrant
marriages and enduring marriages are in and of themselves a wealth of practical, relevant,
time-tested wisdom for us to glean from?  The answer is an unqualified “YES!” Both my life and my
marriage were richly blessed and deepened by this book—I’m confident yours will be too. Thank
you, Dr. Lovejoy!

Jay Messenger
Lead Pastor, Grace Community Church, Gresham

Dr. Lovejoy has masterfully used his deep knowledge of human nature, historical
texts, and ancient cultural insights to add rich texture to the marriages we see in the
Bible. He skillfully brings out timeless principles from these marriages to apply to our
marriages today. With the lessons learned from the good marriages, as well as the bad, Dr.
Lovejoy empowers couples to strengthen and build-up their marriages to create loving, caring,
happy relationships that can go the distance.

Jennifer Streger Estrada, CF APMP, Senior Proposal Writer

Insightful! Dr Lovejoy does a wonderful job of illuminating the strengths and
weaknesses of marriages in a fallen world. His therapeutic insights are on full display as he
walks through the marriages recorded in the Scriptures. This is truly a Romans 15:4 book:
'For whatever was written in earlier times was written for our instruction so that through
perseverance and the encouragement of the Scriptures we might have hope' (Romans 15:4). 'Marriages
in the Bible' is a must read as it helps to illuminate God's design for relationship in
the midst of a broken world.

Paul Govert, PsyD

'Protecting your marriage from the assault on its integrity and loyalty is paramount
to preserving it,' says Dr. Gary Lovejoy. At no other time in history have marriages
been redefined, misunderstood, degraded, maligned, abandoned, and put to the test. In many
cases, they fail – even those in the Bible. While we all want happy and fulfilling
marriages, many of us don’t know how to go about it. Happiness, it seems, is a byproduct of
putting your spouse above yourself. This practice is often ridiculed by those who elevate
self-interest above sacrifice. As Lovejoy reminds us, 'The unexamined life is simply not an option
if you want a satisfying marriage.' As a publicist, I have read many dozens of marriage
books. This is the best. If you are serious about creating a marriage that thrives, I
encourage you to read this book. If you know someone who is struggling, read this book. As he
reminds us, 'Marriage is a commitment borne on the wings of a love that embraces the whole
person, warts and all.'

Don S. Otis
Veritas Communications
Author of Whisker Rubs: Developing the Masculine Identity

Every couple needs to read this book.

I’ve read hundreds of books on marriage, and this is one of the most memorable.

Dr Gary Lovejoy reminds us that there is so much to learn from the examples of
others. With the wisdom of a Bible student, the curiosity of a college professor, and the
compassion of a psychologist the author guides us through many of the most common challenges
that face marriages.

Rarely does a book entertain, teach, and challenge. This is such a book. Read it
alone, read it with your spouse, read it with a group of other couples! Any way you read it,
it will stretch you to make your marriage everything God wants it to be—-a marriage
where you love, protect, honor, forgive, sacrifice for, and enjoy your spouse.

Dr Lovejoy doesn’t provide easy or simple steps to a happy marriage. He does
something much better. He shows us time tested principles from 17 real life couples in the
Bible. He brings these couple to life in such a vivid and practical way that we realize that
the struggles couples had thousands of years ago are no different than those we face
today. From their examples we learn how to rise above our struggles to a place where God’s
love and grace can truly shine through us. 

This book is not just about marriage, it’s about being faithful follower of the one
who made marriage. It’s about being the best and most healthy person you can be.

Thank you, Dr Lovejoy, for showing us how relevant and practical God’s Word is in
the  midst of this worlds hardest challenges.

Steve Stephens, PhD
President of EveryMarriageMatters and author of Marriage: Experience the Best, 20
Rules and Tools for a Great Marriage, Blueprints for a Solid Marriage, Lost in Translation.